Dumbfounded

Its a beautiful still sunny spring morning as I write this. The Tui are singing joyfully in the garden and I can almost hear the grass growing. It is a day to be alive! We spent the weekend in the Kaimanawa mountains and the peace of the hills has lifted me above the often depressing drag of daily life.
And that is what is so profound.

I don't have a daily life that is a drag. I enjoy my job, love it with a passion actually. I love my life, my location, my friends, my partner, but, often I am fooled into believing that other things on the pheriphery of life should take center stage. Yes, I am a normal human being with many of life's normal hassles and difficulties. I have people who are displeased with me, I have bills to pay and vehicles and appliances that fail me at vital moments. I have aches and pains and disfigurements from a full life lived close to the edge. And many are the small irritations of my days....if I choose to dwell on these things.

I have a labyrinth in my garden, an ancient form of prayer and meditation, and walking slowly around it on this glorious morning I pondered the way many of us (if not all of us) live life as little children in adult bodies. Grown, yet still responding to our world from within the fears and imaginations of children, peering out from our special safe places, waiting for...someone to rescue us?, or permission to be?. Living life in such a way is what makes it a drag. It forces us to pretend we are grown up and independent when in reality we are desperatley dependent on others and our circumstances to feel safe and happy. But this is not true reality! True reality is this..the world is round. What, I hear you say is he talking about? I'm talking about the difference between a flat earth and a round one. On a flat earth it is possible to go too far toward the edge and fall off-there are distinct boundaries where you cannot go. On a  round earth on the other hand it is entirely possible to go in any direction for as long as you want and still be on the earth. And that is true reality. You and I are able to choose how we live, how we respond to our circumstances and what pleasures or ambitions we will pursue and we need never fear falling off the world. It is simply impossible while experiencing human life to cease to be human. Unpleasant sometimes, but we get to learn and choose even in those circumstances.

What I'm trying to say in all this is that I could choose to live each day focusing on the things that make life a drag. Or I can choose how I will feel and focus on the many joys and pleasures of this beautiful world and have a great day.

I blog because I like to write and if I wanted to I could find many excuses and valid reasons why I shouldn't, but I've chosen to enjoy life, and so I blog.

I guess I'm dumbfounded as to why I took so long to realise that the child in me is still allowed to live 'in the moment' and enjoy playing where-ever I am.